By Heather Cabot, The Well Mom
Like so many of us, 40-year-old Aviva Goldfarb grew up with a mom who made a hot meal for the family every night. When she had her first child, she suddenly found herself yearning to give her own children the same experience.  Although she had recipes for her mother’s staples, she wanted to make more modern meals – healthier, faster and less focused on meat.

“I realized that recipes don’t turn out as well as magazines or cookbooks promise,” she says of her early experiences trying to learn her way around the kitchen.

What began as an informal quest for good food to feed her family ended up turning into a passion for making it simple and enjoyable for other people.  Nearly five years after starting to cook and test recipes with a friend and self-publishing a cookbook, she launched www.thescramble.com in 2003, a one-stop weekly menu planner for time-crunched chefs.  The site provides subscribers with a week of quick dinner recipes, a printable grocery list and access to The Scramble’s huge recipe database.  Not long after the launch, The Six O’Clock Scramble cookbook was published by St. Martin’s Press.  It’s now in its fifth printing and she’s plotting out the next edition.

Goldfarb explains the whole idea is to provide people with a plan so they’re not “scrambling” at dinnertime. Click here to check out a sample menu.

“Times have changed and we don’t want to make what our mothers made…I have a strong environmental interest. I try not to base every meal around meat and by planning and shopping, you really can save time and money,” says the mom of two who now lives in Chevy Chase, Maryland.

Goldfarb’s transition to motherhood was a driving force behind the business.  After a fast-paced career in media relations for non-profits in Washington, D.C., she decided to stay at home with her son.  It wasn’t long before she began looking for something more to do.

“I am a very active person and I can’t just sit around and I knew I wasn’t going to  just do housework all day. But cooking was creative and healthy and it allows me to spend time with my kids,” she told me in a recent interview.

And launching the business came with an added benefit.  Through her interest in food, she found common ground with her single and working mom friends.

“It gives me an identity and a way to connect with other people.  And living in the DC area, SO much can be so partisan.  Food is nonpartisan.  It is something that everyone can agree on and food can really bring us together,” she says.

And since maintaining friendships after motherhood is so important to both Goldfarb and The Well Mom, she came up with an easy menu you can make for your book club or any other occasion to host a gathering of your girlfriends.  You’ll find it under “Girls’ Night In” in Well-Nourished.

By Rebecca Rodskog, Rodskog Change Consulting
When you find yourself in that sleep-deprived state, constantly conflicted between the mundane labors of caregiving and the overpowering joy that little bundle brings you, you have a quandary on your hands.  And it’s one every new mom knows well.
I’m not just talking about whether to work or not to work – but the bigger, harder questions: “Who am I now?” and “Who do I want to be?”  Where do you even begin to sort it out?

In order to live your most joyous life, you need to start with your core values.  They will drive every decision, from big to small, even when you can’t see straight because you haven’t slept more than 45 minutes at a time!  This is the first step on your growth journey.

Roy Disney, nephew of Walt Disney, said, “It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”  

Think about it.  Those moments when you’re caught between going to a networking event or staying at home with your baby happen because of one thing:  you are fuzzy on which will make you happier or what combination of things will lead you to a happier life.  We make decisions all the time but hardly ever take the time to figure out what really makes us happy.  So how can we expect that our decisions will lead us to happiness?

Figuring Out What Makes Your Heart Sing: Your Core Values
Here are two simple exercises to get you going:

Ask yourself the following questions:
1. On an ideal day, what would I do?

2. What accomplishments or measurable events must occur during my lifetime so that I will have lived a life of few or no regrets?

3. Do I have a secret passion?  Something that is almost too exciting to actually do or do more of?

And then, using the answers to the above as your guide, do the following exercise (adapted from Tom Leonard’s book, The Portable Coach):

1. On a blank sheet of paper, draw a line down the center, vertically.  Label the left side of the page “ME” and the right side “NOT me.”

2. Start writing words that resonate with you on the left side, and words that make you cringe on the right.  If the left side is hard to come up with, than look at the right and write the opposite of that word on the left.

3. After you have around 20 on the left, stop and assess.  I want to get you down to your CORE values – maybe about five.  Cross out the “needs” and “wants” from your list. 

- A VALUE represents the interests or qualities that attract YOU.  If there is a natural or uncomplicated pull, it’s probably a value. 
- If there’s urgency, it’s probably a NEED.
- If there’s a craving or desire, it’s probably a WANT.

Your values should be full of words that are reflected in the answers to the first three questions.  Those things that give you JOY, that are YOU, are your values. 

Post these up where you can see them every day, and when you’re having trouble making a decision, glance at them for reassurance and guidance.  

When you start with joy at your core, you can go anywhere!

Next Month:  Setting Goals that Align with Your Core Values – you really CAN have a perfect life! Got a question for Rebecca? We’d love to hear from you!
Email: heather@thewellmom.com

Rebecca Rodskog is a NYC based personal life coach, change management consultant, actress and mom.  She has worked with corporations and individuals for over 15 years helping them grow through change in the workplace and at home.  For more information, check out www.rodskog.com.